7. THE GESTATIONAL SURROGATE HAS BABYSITTING HELP AVAILABLE. This seems so easy, yet it has been a big stumbling block. The Surrogate should have a sitter and a back-up plan. Many physicians will not allow children in their waiting room, so there needs to be someone who can watch them In addition, emergencies can happen. If the Surrogate does not have sitters available, work with her to locate some she will be comfortable with.
8. THERE IS AGREEMENT ABOUT THE DELIVERY ARRANGEMENTS, WHO WILL BE IN THE DELIVERY ROOM, NOTIFICATION PROCEDURES, MAKING MEDICAL DECISIONS. What is the plan? With the advent of cell phones, it is much easier for the parties to stay in touch, but what is the backup if there is no answer? Commit this plan to writing, and notify the hospital of the Surrogate’s wishes. Remember the Surrogate is the patient; the hospital should follow the Surrogate’s wishes. Additionally, if there is a medical emergency, who will make medical decisions on behalf of the child if the intended parents are not available? Who will make medical decisions on behalf of the Surrogate if she is incapacitated? A durable power of attorney should be created for the Surrogate and an alternate for the intended parents should be listed in the contract or agreement.
9. THE GESTATIONAL SURROGATE IS IN AGREEMENT WITH YOU ABOUT BREAST MILK PUMPING. While this is thought to be medically helpful to contract the uterus back to normal size, for many women, this is a painful process, physically, and possibly emotionally. Additionally, pumping is very time consuming. Most pumping is done between 5-8 times a day. Each pumping session can take 30 to 60 minutes to pump both breasts. If you wish to have breast milk for your child, ask if your Surrogate is comfortable pumping milk and negotiate appropriate compensation. Discuss how the milk will be stored and delivered. All of this should be either written into your gestational Surrogate contract or should be written as an addendum.
10. THE GESTATIONAL SURROGATE IS IN AGREEMENT WITH YOU ABOUT ANY POST BIRTH CONTACT. For some folks, having post birth contact is natural. For others, they want all contact to cease immediately after birth. Will the Surrogate have the child with her in the hospital or have a quiet time to bid the farewell. Will the baby be handed immediately to the intended parents or to the Surrogate? Will the Surrogate’s children be able to view the baby? Again, get the expectations out in the open. Is there to be any continuing contact? Although most families do not have substantial continuing contact, it is not unusual for families to send photos to the Surrogate on the child’s birthday, so the Surrogate can see how well they are doing.
After you’ve thought about these 10 things, you probably have some questions. Why don’t you call us and we can set up a time to discuss? Or you can go to our website and learn more there, and send us your contact information.